Crazy, Sexy, Cool Item Reviews!!
  • The Chemist
    The Chemist
    by Stephenie Meyer

    I love this book. It is a mix of Jason Bourne and Hunger Games! Must Read!

  • Urban Decay Naked Palette
    Urban Decay Naked Palette
    Urban Decay

    Alright, the new fall NAKED Palette is my SEXY for the week!!! All the natural, neutral colors are in the palette and it is so awesome!!!

  • Urban Decay 15 Year Anniversary Eyeshadow Collection
    Urban Decay 15 Year Anniversary Eyeshadow Collection
    Urban Decay

    I've had this COOL pallete since it came out and I have created so much awesomeness with it!

Search and Archive Index
« New Year, New Bitch | Main
Sunday
Nov292009

How to Make Her Quit Her Bitching

Dating a bitch? Im gonna give you 5 rule of thumbs and if you mess it up, then you're a dumbass.

There are 5 things that keeps your lil hooch happy. Compliments, helping her with whatever she needs, quality time, non sexual touching, and ,of course, gifts! Note that some girls like one more than the other.


Lets break this down one by one.

#1 Compliment Your Bitch

Most of you boys know this. Little flattery goes a long way. Tell her that she has a gorgeous smile, a nice ass, and that her she cooks the best bowl of ramen noodles. Pretty girls know that they're pretty but it's nice to be reminded. Also compliment something besides her looks.


#2 Be Useful to Your Bitch

Get your lazy butt off the couch and wash the dishes, fold the laundry, run her errands, take Mr. Fluffy to the groomers, mop the floor, make her breakfast, take the trash out. Damn I like this one. Nothing is sexier than a man who's doing house work.


#3 Spend Some Quality Time With Your Bitch

Pay attention to this one. Quality Time isn't just being in the same room together. It's the moments when you actually talk and get to know each other. People change all the time. If you spend quality time, this will help you grow together instead of growing apart. This is why couples should never ever stop dating each other.


#4 Touchy Feely Without Being Sleezy

Women loves sex just as much as men do, but we need to be held in non-sexual ways also. We like to be hugged, have our hands held, cuddle, and massages that doesn't lead to sex. Last thing you want to do is make a girl feel like a piece of ass, or you get no ass.


#5 Shower Your Bitch With Gifts

This area always confused me because I was never a gift kinda girl. However all of the girls in my family are. They're the easiest people to buy christmas/birthday presents for. Some girls just really love gifts. Find out what the girl likes and get it for her. Look, we're not like boys. We DONT need one each! The more options, the better!!!! So what if we already have 20 handbags, we want more damnit! (If you are just bad at picking gifts, then take the bitch shopping)

 

There you go kids! 5 things that keeps your get your bitch to quit her yapping. 4 out 5 doesn't even cost you a penny. You should be able to do those 4 on a regular basis. The gift thing you should be able to do. If you can't, then you have no business dating this bitch. What you need to do is to downgrade. Get yourself a chunky skank ho because she'll take either way and still love your broke ass.

Until Next Time.

Larissa

Reader Comments (4)

LOL

November 30, 2009 | Registered CommenterAntukin

dont bitches hates all these things you mentioned?

December 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMr. Fragelistic

They don't hate it, they just love complaining about it..
The idea that it's hard to please a bitch sometimes is the challenge most men are looking forward to. There's no fun in getting exactly what you want at the first attempt, isn't it? It's like reaching orgasm during the first 30-seconds, afterward you got no objective in continuing the game..

December 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJuliana Ayu Yahya

Larissa, you made me laugh. You got it right! T. Cat

August 12, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterT. Cat

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.

My response is on my own website »
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>